The English language is in decline.

Nonplussed: so surprised and confused that one is unsure how to react.

If it looks like there’s a negative at the beginning of this word, it’s because etymologically speaking, there is – it’s from Latin non plus, « no more, no further. » Still, as the word plussed doesn’t exist it confuses the mind. Americans use it to describe someone not disconcerted; unperturbed

Inchoate: only partly in existence; imperfectly formed

It is confusing that the in- at the start of this word is the same as the one at the start of other familiar words; incompetent or infamous. But beware; the first letters of this word are not a negative. The word comes from Latin inchoare, which meant « to begin. » Inchoate things are often just commencing.

Uncanny: surpassing the ordinary or normal

The word canny is rarely used but not unknown; it joins other familiar words, such as « cunning » or « sly. » The problem is that that’s not the meaning of canny. Canny used to mean « knowing and careful, » and thus uncanny meant « mischievous, » referring to spirits who played with mortals. If you are a Comic book reader you’ll be used to the word as it was used in the « Uncanny X-Men, » title, describing heroes with supernatural powers.

Unabashed: not embarrassed

This strange word used to have a positive friend, alas no longer in use. Abash meant « perplex, embarrass, lose one’s composure » some 6 or 700 years back, therefore unabashed means « not embarrassed. »

Dilatory: wasting time

This word is rather confusing as it sounds like it might be related to dilate or another trendy word depilatory. It’s not, but there are simple ways to remember what dilatory really means; it almost sounds like delay or dilly dally, both of which can be considered as synonyms of dilatory.

English speakers had long ago taken to “strange, articulate utterance, chattering, snarling and harsh teeth-gnashing” bad habits by mixing together of Anglo-Saxons, Vikings and Norman French.

Jonathan Swift said this back in the eighteenth century: our Language is extremely imperfect; that its daily Improvements are by no means in proportion to its daily Corruptions; and the Pretenders to polish and refine it, have chiefly multiplied Abuses and Absurdities; and, that in many Instances, it offends against every Part of Grammar.

His sole comfort was that French was declining as rapidly as English. He proposed the creation of an English academy, along the lines of the Académie Française, to keep the language from deterioration.

The greatest writer to be alarmed by by the decline of English was George Orwell; he wrote in 1946 that “Most people who bother with the matter at all would admit that the English language is in a bad way.”

Twitter, texting and Facebook don’t help.

Yes, we can watch Downton Abbey in the original version; beautifully spoken with added bonus of subtitles to help you remember how the correctly pronounced words are spelled.

Unfortunately, you won’t hear people speak like that in real England.

I regret that during a recent 45 minute London ride on a 11 bus from Shoreditch High Street to Fulham Broadway, a trip that usually lets you hear the wondrous diversity of accents spoken by the various indigenous inhabitants, not once did I hear the lovely Cockney slang that should be gradually replaced by a posher Mockney as you fare forth to the western quarters.

It was blurred and foreign even to Tradwell whose youth was rocked by the Islington song in the morning and rolled by the South Kensington Asprey’s daughter Gosh tweet in the evening.

Luckily, to help you in stressless navigation of the many meanders of modern English, Lynne Truss published “Eats, Shoots & Leaves” in 2003.

Buy it, read it, put it under your pillow and you will soon be writing faultless and convincing motivation letters to your future employers. Your PowerPoint presentations will become dynamic and the English version of your website will be understood.

Failing that, get Tradwell to help you make the difference. A lot of faithful clients do.